#caregivers

#caregivers

Much of our lives in the United States is spent chasing freedom and independence. That instinct reflects a broader cultural value system we're steeped in: individualism. Individualism prioritizes personal autonomy, self-reliance, and the individual's needs over those of the group. The United States has an individualism score of 91 out of 100, making it the most individualistic country in the world according to Gert Hofstede's model of national culture.

Lee, a software engineer who previously worked at Google and Uber, recognized those struggles for the first time a few years ago, when her grandmother died after a long battle with dementia. Lee's aunt, who she described as an "alpha daughter," had been her grandmother's primary caretaker for years. "I just, from the sidelines, thought she was a complete superhero. She was an architect, she was raising children, she was taking care of my grandmother," Lee said. "But it was at the memorial service that I realized she actually just fully broke during that whole journey."

Imagine being judged not for what you do, but for standing beside someone you love. The stares, the awkward silences, and the pitying looks aren't aimed at you, but you feel them all the same. Caregivers often carry a weight that has nothing to do with their own actions and everything to do with how others react to the person they care for.

Too often, mental health strategies overlook the people quietly carrying layered responsibilities outside of work: caregivers, older employees, and women navigating pivotal life and health transitions.

"At a time where it seems fewer and fewer of us want to work in long-term care, the need has never been greater," Harvard healthcare policy analyst David C. Grabowski told The Times' Emily Alpert Reyes in January.