Philosophy
fromPsychology Today
5 days agoIdentity: Who I Am, Who I Am Not
Narrow identity reduces individuals to superficial labels, leading to confusion between identity, belonging, and morality.
When I first met Rashida, she introduced herself with a disclaimer: "I'm a little intense." She said it with a grimace, as if the label left a bad taste in her mouth. I replied, "Good to know. What else should I know about you?" She told me she was a mother, a recent pickleball enthusiast, and a leader in risk and compliance at a Fortune 500 company. I thought maybe such a role demanded intensity, but I still asked, "Where does that 'intense' label come from?"
One of the most valuable things parents can do for their children is simply avoid labeling them, McManne said. Labels hurt the parent-child relationship because they get in the way of parents seeing their children as struggling and needing help. Parents start to link certain behaviors with whatever label they've given to their child, rather than digging in and really trying to understand what's happening developmentally. "Labels take us further out of compassion and curiosity," McManne said.